When Last I'm Wept

That day I go to school as usual. Along the way to school, my mind focused on the grandmother lying in a hospital. Grandmother had two days in the emergency ward. Grandmother still unconscious. Yesterday, I seriously cried when seeing the grandmother. I grew sad day and faces the mind with memories of grandmother

I was surprised when Mrs Asiah told me that my brother's father came to pick me back. My heart thump. Feel that something bad happened to my grandmother. However, I try to delete anything that comes to my mind. I really hope that what I fear for this do not happen.

Father, my brother just animal. He did not speak even one word to me. When reached at home, I see many people in my house. The women I see selendang or uncovered. The men are mostly com songkok or skullcap. Respectively humble reading of the Qur'an. So, I am guessing it had happened. I just want to cry then. However, my mind immediately to calm my emotions. I look for my father to get certainty about what actually happened.

When the utility appears to me, because I already moved. From the back of my father see my sister, and brother-sister rushed toward me in tears. Sister embraced me as telling that the ancestors have left us all. Her grandmother had died. I believe in hard words. The most I fear all this really happened. At that time also felt embarrassed, I choked and without realizing it out of my eyes water and obscure my perspective and finally flowing gently wet my cheek and down to drop two dress. I began to hear voices crying and at one time I almost can not control its own promise as difficult to accept the bitter reality is.

I entered the room where the dead are placed. Se looks cold and stiff body lying motionless on the bed. I see blurred because restrain tears. My grandmother remains close. My grandmother hugs with love. Her face is pale, it seems sweet smile. I seem to not believe what I see and touch me then. I do not believe that the grandmother would go as soon as we leave. But the death of God's call could not be arrested.

More sympathetic when you see my brothers crying . I embrace both the sister who was a child. They still have not understood anything. At a young age so they have lost a loving grandmother pampered. View, reflection, and empathy shown by those who come to visit my dead grandmother, causing more grief and faces. I tried to calm the feelings by reading the holy verses of the Quran.

During the funeral grandmother washed and me, sister, brother, sister, mother, father, and my relatives gathered. Dad did not cry, but her face sad and grief. Another sister and relentless crying. Prior to pray for the dead in, we are given the opportunity to face kissing grandmother was modified. While waiting I am kissing your grandmother's forehead, his face stares at me a long time after this, I know your grandmother face no more in front of me except in my memory.

Sister fainted when kissing your grandmother's forehead. They had to be lifted by those who have been there. I only noticed them while strengthening almost dust. Then, I carefully while kissing the forehead of fathers to hold my tears dripping on the forehead of the fathers. Ice-cold forehead grandmother. How hard it is to release a person in love than to go when we know that it will not be back.

I accompanied the remains of ancestors to the cemetery. Fathers coffin slowly add to the grave. Talkin After the read, people gradually left the cemetery. I still did not move from the dead ancestors. The weight of my heart for going to leave it. Various mixed feelings swell in me.

Eventually I left the cemetery after persuaded by his mother and father. I am going low while residues wipe tears. My eyes swollen because of too many tears. Just I know that since returning from school today, I still have not changed his clothes. And since I am not touching anything. My stomach feel full and feel like everything happens in a dream.

For the first time in my life, I feel so lonely. The death of a grandmother who loved me the most is not possible to find my replacement. If I am given the choice, I want it to die first. Up to now I still can not forget those events. Every time such an event to remember, every time that my tears . May God shower mercy souls with his grandmother.